They say the awkward moments in life are the best moments. The moments where you fight, cry, laugh, or just all of the above. The moments where you want to tare your opponent to shreds or just cry on his or her shoulder. The whole world knows perfection doesn't exist, truth is why do we still want to achieve perfection?
"Why didn't you tell me you ran away?! I thought you died or some shit, I was ready to put missing posters up throughout Tulsa." Kitty screamed as I took my ear away from the receiver. I sighed putting the last of my bags down. "I was going to tell you-" "WHEN?!" I glanced at the small pills of Ecstasy in my hand. "Whenever I felt like." I swallowed the handful,downing it with water. "No normal person just ditches town whenever they fucking feel like it. You don't just go, hey this town sucks let's leave and don't tell anyone!" Kitty yelled. My blue eyes softened, "Kitty," I began. "Sorry." She mumbled realizing about my "situation" and the time before that with Danielle. I sat down on a chair cupping my face in my hands. "I didn't mean for any of this to happen. And what happened.. I couldn't take it anymore, so I went on the first nonstop flight to Miami with Danielle. I left everything hoping it will be better when I come back, but my main objective was to wakeup from this nightmare I'm living. So I guess I broke up with Sam unofficially because I mailed him back his ring. But in Florida with my grandmother was a fucking nightmare. I forgot how much I really resented her, so now I'm here. Caught up enough?" I sighed. The line was still and I wiped the stray tears sitting on
my eyelashes. "Yeah, I guess. But you should have told someone you were leaving for a bit." "Mhm, sure." My stomach growled and I immediately placed my hand on it, you want to believe that you're still carrying but you can't. "I get it. So how about you come over here today?" Kitty said lifting her voice up. "I don't have a sitter for Danielle." "Call Evie." I groaned
in defeat, "Fine." The line went dead and I went to the bathroom and slammed the door.
"Wow... You look... Never mind." Kitty said eyeing my apparel. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. I haven't slept much lately." "And why is that?" "Nightmares." Her look softened, I could tell she was feeling somewhat sympathy for me. "Uhm you hungry?" "I just ate." I sat down and felt my eyes slowly closing. But, I somehow managed to feel the death stare of Mrs. KitKat Curtis-Matthews. "Cut the bullshit already." "I don't know-" "I thought you got over it." Kitty said cutting me off mid sentence. I was silent, and dropped my hands in defeat. I didn't say a word and hoped for the best. "You told me you will stop." "You said you will too." "And you really believed me?" Kitty scoffed. "I could say the same to you." "I have a tendency to lie and forget Ms. Davis." I raised an eyebrow trying to think of something to say, so I decided to say the truth. "It's an addiction I can't just promise to stop." "You look unhealthy." She simply said. "So do you." "You were carrying twins and you barely have any baby weight left." "It doesn't matter to you." Kitty dragged me and made me look in a mirror. "Do you think you look
good?" I broke down in tears and just lost it. I put my head between my knees and my sobs grew louder. I had to get her to stop making me talk about my "problem". "What about you? You're
not perfect either, and... And you're just jealous that I can get pregnant and you can't." I shouted at her between sobs. I felt like a huge jackass, infertility is one of the consequences of Bulimia that I fortunately haven't endured... Yet. Infertility does something to you that you just can't explain, I wiped my tears off my hollow face. I looked up at Kitty
and her fists were clenched. Her breathing got heavy and she stood there motionless, "Kitty," I began attempting to apologize. "At least I'm not a no good slut who is still in love with
her ex boyfriend who's married, at least I didn't get pregnant 2 times and I'm still a teenager. You avoid problems and... You can't stick to one relationship without fucking cheating." My sobs turned into gasps for air, I saw Kitty's intimidating height tower over my 5"1 frame. She collapsed next to me, "Fighting is getting us nowhere." Kitty said staring at me. "No duh." "I think you're depressed and I'm not saying this because I'm pissed of at you. I'm saying this as one of your best friends, you need help. Go see a psychiatrist they have
places or something you can check yourself into a facility." "I'm not seeing anyone or going to a fucking institution for that matter. I'm perfectly fine, I could stop whenever I want
to." "Sandy it's getting out of control." "I know I'm fucked up, it doesn't take a genius to figure that out. Bulimia is mental, and... I have it under control." Kitty sighed putting her head back against the wall. "We keep on talking about my problem, and I know you're not alright. Tell me, about whatever is bothering you. Just let it all out you know I won't judge you." I told her.
